14 Signs Your Cat Is Really the Boss

Cats have a way of running the show without us realizing it. These moments prove that they secretly call the shots in your life.

1. Meticulous Property Inspections

If your cat insists on walking into every room before you do, it’s not just curiosity – it’s a property inspection. Your furry landlord is checking for cleanliness and unauthorized changes and making sure you haven’t brought in any illegal pets, like that suspicious-looking goldfish.

2. Rent Collection via Treats

Every time your cat meows insistently around mealtime, it’s not just hunger – it’s rent collection time. The currency? Treats and premium cat food. Late payments result in loud meowing at 3 AM, the feline equivalent of a sternly worded notice.

3. Setting Curfews

Does your cat get agitated when you stay up too late? That’s because, as your landlord, it has set a strict curfew. The building is to be quiet and lights off by 10 PM, or else you face the wrath of a sprinting cat at midnight.

4. Furniture Arrangement Approval

If your cat disapproves of your new sofa placement, it will show it by pointedly ignoring the sofa or, worse, using it as a scratching post. All furniture arrangements must have prior approval from your feline overlord.

5. Mandatory Daily Meetings

Those moments when your cat sits on your laptop or book? That’s your daily mandatory meeting with the landlord. Agenda: petting, attention, and an update on when the next bag of treats will be purchased.

6. Regular Property Surveys

Your cat’s random sprints around the house aren’t just for exercise – they are property surveys. Ensuring everything is up to standard and no mice have set up shop in the premises is a serious landlord responsibility.

7. Strict Guest Policies

When your cat hides or hisses at guests, it’s enforcing its strict guest policy. Approval is required for all visitors, and your cat reserves the right to disapprove of anyone, especially those allergic to cats.

8. Utility Control

Is your cat always lounging on the warmest or coolest spots in the house? That’s because, as the landlord, it controls the utilities. Heating and air conditioning are adjusted to feline comfort standards, not human ones.

9. Supervising Cleaning Activities

Your cat’s watchful eye during cleaning isn’t just curiosity; it’s supervision. As your landlord, it needs to ensure you’re using the right cleaning products and techniques – especially on its litter box.

10. Bedroom Allocation

If your cat has claimed the sunniest bedroom as its own, that’s not a coincidence. Your landlord has first dibs on room selection, and you’re left with whatever space is remaining.

11. Strict No-Dog Policy

The reason your cat hisses at dogs isn’t just dislike; it’s enforcing the building’s strict no-dog policy. Violations of this policy are met with immediate disapproval and potential eviction (of the dog, not you).

12. Insisting on ‘Maintenance’ Pets

A cat, as your landlord might suggest (insist) on getting ‘maintenance’ pets, like fish or birds. These are, of course, for the cat’s personal entertainment and should be considered as part of the lease agreement.

13. Garden and Plant Regulations

When your cat nibbles on your plants or lounges in your flower beds, it’s not being mischievous. It’s conducting a quality check on your gardening, ensuring all flora meets the building’s aesthetic standards.

14. Regular Security Drills

Those moments when your cat stares intently at nothing? Those are regular security drills. As the landlord, it’s their duty to protect the premises from invisible threats – and possibly ghosts.

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